I was born in 1944, a child of the war and the following years. It was a simpler time, one which was probably more similar to the preceding years than to the subsequent years. It was a rural time and place in which religion was important. And our religion, a fundamentalist Christian faith, demanded church attendance and Bible study. We were as versed in Scriptures as anyone.
While a child, one just entering puberty, I discovered a passage about King David of the Jews which I would read often and allow my youthful and silly imagination to race with all the possibilities introduced by what was done for him in his old age. A kid with a Bible can be a dangerous thing. There are stories, descriptive phrases and other literary devices which probably should not be given to a child without some kind of guidance. Of course, there are adults who develop amazing and unbelievable theological theories, which defy logic and reason, either from an honest misunderstanding of the Scriptures or from a desire to confuse and frighten people not skilled in their own studies. Such theories were originally propagated as an effort to control the masses and now are either continued for the same purpose or to make money. The Left Behind series comes to mind. But, I digress. Back to King David.
In 1 Kings, chapter 1, we are introduced to an event about King David which was never taught in Sunday School. It was an event which occurred when he was an old man. Back then I had no idea what it was like to be old. That was something for my grandparents. The Bible says, “Now king David was old and stricken in years; and they covered him with clothes, but he gat no heat.” First, I found that word “gat” to be entertaining. We used the King James Version in those days. Everyone did. It was a matter of faith. There were a few, very few, other translations available to us, the proliferation of Biblical translations would occur a few years later. But the way we looked at it, if the King James Version was good enough for Jesus and the Apostles, it was good enough for us.
“Gat” must have been the past tense of the verb “get” in earlier times. When we conjugate the verb “get” we say “get,” “got,” “have gotten.” There must have been a time when it was “get,” “gat” and whatever else, I’m not sure what. The dictionary defines the word “gat” as an archaic past tense of the verb “get.” I just enjoyed saying the word “gat” and still try to use it today whenever I can.
David was old and he gat no heat. Old people get cold easier. I speak now with some sense of authority on the matter as the older I get the colder I get. But I was a child back then and I imagined an old man laying in bed and no matter how many home-made quilts they piled on him he was still cold. He just couldn’t get warm. His trusted advisors came up with what looked like a very good idea to me.
“Wherefore his servants said unto him, Let there be sought for my lord the king a young virgin: and let her stand before the king, and let her cherish him, and let her lie in thy bosom, that my lord the king may get heat.” Now, there’s some smart advisors, I thought. What an idea! Get cold, get a virgin to crawl in bed with you and warm you up. Better than simply piling on the covers. Better than a heated brick. Better than a hot water bottle or even an electric blanket. Those people knew some really good home remedies.
(Let me pause here to comment on the outrageous actions of the King and his servants. They weren’t going to ask the young woman to do this, she was going to be taken by force and placed in this situation. It may have been better than the life from which she was going to be taken but it is still illustrative of how women were considered chattel in those times. This story may illustrate what Mel Brooks meant when he said, “It’s good to be the king,” but it still amounts to kidnapping and rape and no one cared. But, none of that occurred to me when I was a child.)
“So they sought for a fair damsel throughout all the coasts of Israel, and found Abishag a Shunammite, and brought her to the king.” I had no idea what a Shunammite was but if Abishag was the prettiest young virgin they could find in the whole kingdom they must be beautiful women. We don’t know that much about her except we speculate she was young, probably middle teen years, and very beautiful. And she dutifully served the king. “And the damsel was very fair, and cherished the king, and ministered to him: but the king knew her not.” She crawled into bed with the old man and did everything she could to arouse him but he could do nothing. He could not have sex with her. I realized he wasn’t just cold and she wasn’t just trying to warm him up. There was more to it which in my youthful experience I couldn’t understand. The great King David still “gat no heat.”
When I first read this as a child, it titillated me.
As a young man, it amused me.
As an older man, it saddened me.
And now, today, I have concluded that if they really wanted the king to get some heat, if that was really what they were trying to accomplish, they should not have selected a young virgin, they should have sought out a menopausal woman having hot flashes.
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